Nim Stant: Hi everyone, welcome to the Global Thought Leaders TV. Oh my goodness, today I have a special guest. Welcome Carrie Conroy in the house.

Carey Conley: So fun to be here, Nim. Thank you for having me.

Nim Stant: I just listened to your talk. Thank you. So powerful. Can I be real and raw with you? Sure. I’m gonna ask you a question that will impact our audience the most.

Carey Conley: Okay. People that watching you, people that read your book, what is the one word that you want to give it to them? What inspire? What’s something? So the book you’re talking about is the book that I co authored with my daughter. It’s called Keep Looking Up.

Nim Stant:Share a little bit about that.

Carey Conley: Yeah, so my daughter and I co authored this together in 2018.

Carey Conley: Okay. It was a year after we had lost my 25 year old son to suicide and unfortunately three years prior to that in 2014 we also lost my husband to suicide. So my daughter and I felt very called to write this book, not just to share our story and what happened, but to share our story. But we shared 11 chapters of what we learned in the journey and because we had so many people coming to us Asking, you know, how are you getting through that?

Carey Conley: How can I ask somebody else get through that? So it’s a lot of kind of a Here’s what we know helped us that hopefully can help you So it was a that’s why we called it keep looking out because we just want people to keep Knowing that there’s a different perspective and that they can do some things throughout their journey to help them.

Well, I mean, it sounds inspiring, but I know that the journey is not that easy. Right. What is the one thing that keep you looking up and keep you move forward and not be in the victim mode? What is that?

Carey Conley: Vision. That’s what I’m known for. Tell me more. Yeah. So I help people get a very crystal clear. Written leap off the page like air to breathe vision for their life because I have had one for well over half of my life now and him and it has helped me get through a lot, both personally and professionally and is probably one of the biggest anchors that has helped me get through all this loss.

Um, you know, without a vision, especially one that’s bigger than you, it’s so easy for people to drift and I’m not just talking about from major loss or tragedy, but little things. What is your vision, Cherry? Uh, my vision now is to teach other people why they need to have a vision. What, what was your vision before?

Uh, you know, when I first started in my late 20s, my vision was to create a business so that I could stay home and have the lifestyle with the family. Raising my kids with my husband, uh, and did that very successfully. But then after, uh, losing my husband or my son, it became very apparent to me that this is a much bigger mission than just helping other people grow a business.

Right. This is about saving lives now because people without vision perish.

Nim Stant: When that happened, did you ask yourself, why me?

Carey Conley: I don’t know that I ever asked the words, why me? Um, I think we were completely in shock of how did this happen and how could we not see it coming. Um, but I don’t specifically ever saying why me.

Nim Stant: That’s awesome. That’s mean you’re not in the victim mode.

Carey Conley: Well, there’s lots of other modes you can be in, but I guess you could say that. Um, you know, very sad, obviously still and still won’t understand all of the reasons why this happened. I can’t change it. Yeah. So, I’m just now figuring out how can I take this, work through it, so that I can help other people work through it too.

Um, it’s very hard when people get in that victim mode to get out of it.

Nim Stant: Yeah.

Carey Conley: Yeah. So, how can you help them? Uh, well, number one, I need them to understand that they do have a vision and a purpose. Most people have never sat down to write it out like I teach them to do on paper. So they’re walking around doing all the things they think they’re supposed to be doing instead of really following the one thing that they are called to do.

You know, I call it God’s will for their life. I’m very, very certain that this is what I’m called to do. And so I really want to help people, especially young adults. I’m really, really focused right now on young 20 year olds to 30 year olds, because there is not a lot of help for them right now. And they are very.

Unsatisfied with their life.

Nim Stant: How can we, the audience here, when they listen to your story, how can they be a good and better support for their family? If they’ve had a loss, um, still have them, you know, like not the loss yet, but how can we be aware and we support, be a good support?

Carey Conley: Sure. Um, I think it’s important for people to know, especially parents that your vision is not their vision for them.

And I think so many times your vision, your, their vision is not your vision for them. And I think a lot of times we forget that, that they have their own path to follow. And instead, what we want to do is. put them on our path that we want them to go down. Sure. This was my story and I’ve shared it many times that, you know, I grew up thinking that I was going to be an actress and a singer and go to Hollywood, do all the things.

And my family was like, yeah, no, you’re going to go to school and get a college degree and get a good job. Cause nobody in my family had ever done that. And so lovingly, you know, they were protecting me. It’s probably a good thing. Cause I don’t think I would’ve made it in Hollywood, but, uh, but I think we have to remember as hard as it is, especially as parents.

Who think we’re doing the right thing for our kids to tell them, yeah, we really want you to do this. Um, because that’s what we want for them or what we would have wanted for ourselves. To instead talk to them about what’s your vision for your life? Like, what do you really want? But what if they don’t know?

I think that it’s very common for them not to know right now because nobody started asking them at an early age.

Nim Stant: Right. So how early can, should we ask our children? How? I’m

Carey Conley: talking to my grandsons now. They’re four and five years old, right? Because they, right now, there’s so much research on this and so much, um, teaching and learning you can do around this, around how trauma sets in at a really early age, like before five.

And I think a lot of that has to do with them being told how they’re supposed to be instead of letting them be the way they are. And so I don’t think early is enough.

Nim Stant: There’s no too soon. Yeah, there’s no

Carey Conley: too late. No, too soon. No, too late. It’s harder though. The older you are to undo all those messages.

Nim Stant: Yeah, things that you already planned the seed in your brain. Yes. Yeah. I

Carey Conley: mean, I’m almost 62 years old and I’m still untangling some of those messages. Isn’t that right? Yeah.

Nim Stant: That’s awesome. So tell us a little bit more about your book. Okay. Is it for everyone or for a

Carey Conley: specific group of readers? I think it’s for anybody really.

Um, because again, we, two types of people would come forward to my daughter and I, the first type are the people who have had some sort of loss and we’re not navigating it well. And the second group of people were people who said, I have somebody that I really want to help now, and I don’t know how to help them.

So we share a lot of their around what helped us so that they can now apply that to their own life and who they’re trying to help. That’s so wonderful. Yeah. So you and your daughter help mentor them together. Well, mostly I’m working on that right now. My daughter now has two little boys. So that’s her.

That’s her. That’s her. That’s her mentor. Yeah. That’s her. Yes. That’s her group. She’s mentoring. Um, sometimes we speak together if her schedule will allow it. Um, but it’s, you know, hard when you’re.

Nim Stant: Yeah, I do believe that our life is part of the bigger plan and that plan, we have no idea what’s the plan. Um, how can, how can us here not just have a vision, but get up and take action?

Right. What’s your advice for that?

Carey Conley: Get help, have a coach, have a mentor, have somebody that’s going to pull it out of you. It doesn’t have to be spending a lot of money, right? No, it does not. Um, you know, they, I have another book called vision is victory and it’s a workbook that literally people can buy for 20 bucks on Amazon and do it themselves.

Most people won’t. So I encourage people that if you go get the book to have an accountability partner that you work on it together. Okay. Right. Um, I also have a course if they need more help, but it doesn’t have to be a lot. It just has to be where you’ve got accountability because we’ll give up on ourselves all day long.

Nim Stant: And don’t wait until it’s too late. Right. Right. Um, yes. What, what about the vision that you’re teaching people? Can it apply to different areas in your life? Basically, uh, health, financial relationship

Carey Conley: and everything. Yeah. So when I do workshops and I walk people through literally writing their vision on paper, uh, the first thing I get them to do is date the piece of paper as if it’s three years from that day.

And then I get them to write how old they will be on that day, how old their family members will be.

Nim Stant: Okay.

Carey Conley: Right. The reason I do that is because I need to give them a target. And most, most of us don’t do that. We don’t look forward seeing what’s coming. And so we don’t start thinking about, okay, well, my kids are going to be in high school or, right.

And what does this look like? And what can I do right now? to start preparing for that. So, uh, yeah, writing it out in every area of your life, finances, your faith, your friends, your career, um, fitness and health. Right, all the F’s. In

Nim Stant: your experience and in your opinions, is this a different between vision and goal?

Carey Conley: Uh, so vision is the big picture. What are you envisioning your life to look like? Goals then become the steps to help create that. So for example, um, my first. Uh, business was in the area of network marketing, and when I stepped into that, I had a big goal, a three year vision that I wanted to get to by a certain point, um, because I knew that pretty soon we were going to be putting our kids in preschool, and I knew what I needed to be making by then, right?

So then I went to, okay, what’s the business plan that I need to create one year from now, six months from now, and what are the action steps that I can take every day, every week, every month to get there? So the goals are the baby steps to the bigger picture.

Nim Stant: So who is Carrie Colley? If you are not a mentor, if you are not an author or motivational speaker, not a mom, not a, a wife who lost her husband, who are you?

Carey Conley: Well, my favorite role right now is Cece, my grandma, right? You are a grandma. Uh, if you took everything else away, and I don’t mean that, like, taking my daughter. Yeah, take

Nim Stant: every label out. Who are you?

Carey Conley: Um, I just really think that God is using me to change some trajectories,

Nim Stant: right? That’s powerful. Yeah. What, what is your superpower?

Carey Conley: I am really able to help people. I’m able to hear people tell me what they think their vision is, and I can get to the, to the real points really quickly. Um, I can read between the lines of what they’re not saying, what they’re not seeing, um, and really draw it out of them.

Nim Stant: Carrie, how can our audience find you and work with you?

What kind of work that you will help them?

Carey Conley: Okay. So lots of ways you can find me. I do have my own podcast. It’s called Moving Through and Beyond and it’s everywhere. Beautiful name. Um, all the social media channels and I do have my own website called kerryconnelly. com and I have resources there and a way that people can get inside my weekly email newsletter and see what I’m doing.

Nim Stant: How can you, what do you do that is different than the other life coach or mindset coach? Why are you different?

Carey Conley: Because I don’t let people play around with someday. Someday, right? I don’t let them come to me with a vision and say, here’s where I wanna be. I get them to say, give me targets. I need dates, right?

Focus. I need you to tell me, okay, if this is what you want, when are we bringing that to fruition? Ooh. ’cause then this is what, what makes me different? Because most coaches won’t do that.

Nim Stant: Right.

Carey Conley: Right.

Nim Stant: I feel like in our industry, you know, like people just selling the dream, right? What is your vision? Oh, I want to be this and that.

All right. You know, let’s be positive and visualize and everything, but you are different. You, you, you find a target, you help them find a target. And then what happened? Take action from there. Um,

Carey Conley: because I hold them accountable to it and you need somebody holding accountable, especially if you’re going after big dreams because you’re going to hit wall after wall after wall.

Right. And so I’m the one reminding them when they’re hitting the wall to what their vision is, what their target date was that we said so that they don’t. They don’t drift, right? That’s amazing.

Nim Stant: Thank you so much for your work. Thank you so much for listening to God, the higher power, and be the instrument that you are right now.

Thank you for all you do.

Carey Conley: Thanks for having me. Thank you.